I don't speak french, really. Maybe a few words here and there (red boat, what time is it, the bird poops on my head... that kind of stuff). I used to speak German pretty well, but even that is pretty rusty these days. So what so I speak? I speak MOM. I can interpret a whine, a moan, a grunt, and I can hear them from three rooms away. Yep, that's me. MOM.
and wifey, of course...
And really... that's what I've always wanted to be.